Etiquette with a single parent ( Or how not to get your head bitten off while communicating with one)

Dear all,

Do you have a friend that's a new single parent? A relative or a sibling? You feel really bad and would like to reach out to him or her. Oh who am I kidding, I'm referring to single moms. I can only think this would similarly relate to a single dad, but no guarantees. I shall endeavour to write a guide as to what to avoid and what to talk about.

a. Do not constantly call us single moms. Yes that's a fact, but so is the fact that you're ugly.  I don't keep telling you that every 5 minutes, do I?

b. Telling us to "just find someone else and be done with it" isn't going to endear you with anyone. Since when has finding someone been the answer to everything? That's even considering that I think I have a problem that needs solving in the first place. There are such things called friends, you know.

c. If I don't know you very well, please, do not poke and pry into my private life. If i feel like telling you why my marriage broke up I will. If you don't know me very well, don't ask.

d. Again, as stressed in another topic, just because we are divorced people does not mean we are desperate and longing to jump you, your partner or your ugly pimply brother. We have standards. Stop asking if I have had any illicit love affairs lately. Again, refer to (c)

e. Calling us hot mamas or milfs should be done VERY sparingly and jokingly. If I half believed that you mean it and I am not interested in reciprocating, be ready for your throat to be ripped out.

d. If you are a genuine friend and are interested to get to know me better, just spend time with me. Get to know me as a person. There are other facets in me besides the obvious label of a single mom

e. Offer companionship and an ear if needed, or a shoulder if you are close enough. That's appreciated.

f. Keep in touch often. We like to touch base with people that matters. If there's anything we've learnt from being divorced and single parenting, it's this. Time is much too short to be wasted on people that do not matter. If we keep in touch with you, it means we value you.

It may sound like a long list, but we single parents are very loyal. I repeat, once we think of you as our own people, we will fight tooth and nail for you.

xoxo